This saying has been attributed to God, “I will not put more on you than you are able to bear……” Well, God let us talk about that.
God and I have been in a relationship for three decades, Him being front and center for many of those years. We had a little tiff (on my part) for a minute, but we have been hot and heavy for many years now.
Ten years ago, my life took a traumatic turn. I found myself abandoned and alone with my three young kids. A stay-at-home mom, absolutely no money and an old, outdated, dusty yellow resume. The kids were looking to me for answers. I wanted answers and a fairy-god mother. James 2:20 (NLT) says “How foolish! Can’t you see that faith without good deeds is useless?”
Me: God, how am I going to take care of them????
God: Tiffany, my grace is sufficient.
Me: Lord, my wallet is not!!!!
God: Tiffany, make some calls and get in your car.
Me: Lord call whom and drive where?
God: You know.
I went to apply for a food card and Medicaid for the kids and me. Called an attorney, went to file for child support, and sent out resumes. Got a food card and Medicaid, child support papers filed and looked at getting a divorce. It was a very humbling, painful and yet empowering feeling. Knowing I had to relinquish my pride put my big girl pants on and take care of all of us.
When I finally opened up to my Thursday morning bible study group, the support, love, and comfort we received was amazing. Thank you to my COTS family.
There were many, many, many times I wanted to crawl right under the bed and hang out with the dust bunnies. But God was and is always there nudging me forward. I remember thinking okay God, I have this food card, but what about toiletries, dish liquid, detergent, garbage bags, pull-ups; all the stuff a food card can’t purchase.
Then a phone call would come, Tiffany, I’m at the store tell me what you need and what brand. My pride again knocked down, oh just get generic. A knock at the side door and here comes everything but generic. I cried great big puddles of tears, often!
The job I took was the first one offered, a page at the S.E.L Library, making $7.25/hour for 10 hours a week. I told God thank you for everything. I tithed on every bit of money I received.
Then I found out bills had not been paid for the past 3 months. I had to humble myself again, made phone calls, wrote letters having to explain my circumstances and what happened. And God was there each step and every phone call with His grace, mercy, favor and new accounts set up in my name.
I decided to finally finish my degree. Applied for financial aid, and then had to borrow a laptop for 3 weeks. I started two classes the summer of 2011 and every semester through spring of 2015. That summer (2011) I also received a call from GE for a part-time job in customer financial services. I was not at all thrilled, but beggars cannot be choosey. That job turned into a full-time job in November, making a paltry salary, but my God was able.
The benefits the kids and I received were our hand up and leg out for a season. I graduated in May of 2012 with a psychology degree from Tri-C and in 2015 with a bachelor’s degree in accounting from Notre Dame College.
The road has been long and challenging, but God has been and is there every step, every tear, every knockdown and get back up of the way.
I am a divorced mom of three, but have an awesome husband, provider, keeper, and way maker in God. He has taught me again and again that His way is the best way for me. He has taught me how to hear His voice, follow His unction, guidance, and promptings.
Are there days that I still want to crawl under the bed and hang out with the dust bunnies? Absolutely! I now have 2 kids in college and a very persnickety 11-year-old. However, God reminds me all the time, Tiffany I got your back.
Jeremiah 32:27 Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh: is there anything too hard for me. (KJV)
Jeremiah 29:11-13 For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. You will find me when you seek me, if you look for me in earnest. (TLV)
Romans 8:28 And we know that all that happens to us is working for our good if we love God and are fitting into his plans. (TLV)
It does not always feel like it, but it is!!!